I realize now that I’ve never written about this before. I think what might shock guys is how very infrequently us girls think about boobs, except for when they are sore, making us feel fat, attracting unwanted attention, not attracting wanted attention, and swelling with milk for babies. I have not had that last experience so I’ll have to trust mothers I have known to chime in on that.
So, when I was without boobs, I had a circle of friends, and surprise, surprise, our boobs were starting to come in. It was not the central-most topic of conversation, but it was there as an undercurrent. And here was the deal: we already had our judgments in place. If your boobs came in too soon, that was bad. Not that it made the rest of us hate you, but suddenly boys treated you differently. I’m serious about this. Boys did a complete reversal. They didn’t like you or they thought you were stupid, then suddenly “boobs” and they were all over you, hanging all over you, hanging on your every word. It was the most bizarre thing. So any of us who started out jealous would no longer be jealous when it happened to us. It was almost like a game of red rover. Once you crossed to the other side, you were one of them.
If your boobs came in too late, that was bad. It was like maybe there was something wrong with you. If your boobs came in too big, then that was bad. We didn’t hate you, but there was something there that we sort of didn’t like, as if you’d done it on purpose. If your boobs came in too small, that was bad, but we didn’t hate you and we felt sorry for you. Sorry, guys, but I was in that category. My boobs grew around the same time as everyone else’s and they were about the same size, but as my friends grew, so did their boobs a little and mine did not. I still have small boobs. Cup size means less to a guy. I can go A or sometimes B, depending on the brand. I’m sort of in between which is a real pain because I’ve only found one brand that gave me a really comfortable fit and that’s Prima Goddess by Eberjey, and while I think they’re pretty, I also don’t think they’re very sexy. So finding a sexy bra is sometimes a chore and an unpleasant one that usually does not help my self esteem. (You can take the next 3 seconds to pity me and then you have to stop!) I’m about the size of the girl in the picture above (because I know how visual you guys are :P
I remember being a teenager and noticing grown men looking at my boobs. Maybe it was my imagination, but I sort of don’t think so because as I’ve gotten older if I see a young girl who is well endowed, I can keep my eyes open and yep, guys of all ages are taking a gander.
I don’t blame guys for this. I think breasts are very pretty and I look, too, just so you know.
Except for being sore and uncomfortable, I didn’t get much pleasure out of my boobs when I was younger. It felt nice enough when someone rubbed them, but it didn’t feel any sexier or arousing than say, getting a back rub did. A back rub can be very sensual and can certainly get me aroused, but mostly it just feels nice and it’s not necessarily something that will get me turned on. Kiss my lips, kiss my neck (especially the back up toward my hairline, lol–I just shivered thinking about it–and mmm!), kiss my face and certainly kiss me between my legs and I will get completely wet and ready for you.
Until…so I’m in my early twenties and I’ve discovered hypnosis as a fetish or turn on. I’d been aware of it before, but now there are fiction stories and captions and all sorts of things that make me go dreamy and soft and make my body go “yes”. I had a boyfriend who loved my breasts and he didn’t know that they didn’t turn me on, because, yes, I was faking it. And guess what…that got tiring. So, in the spirit of hypnosis and conditioning, I asked him to do something, and I don’t think he ever knew why I asked him lol.
I asked him to play with my nipples at the same time that he played with my clit. My thinking was that the pleasure of getting wet and turned on would get associated in my mind with my nipples. Now, having my nipples played with when I was already turned on certainly wasn’t a bad thing, but just having my nipples played with during foreplay didn’t do anything for me. Without his knowledge, I was hoping to change that.
It worked. Well, it worked reasonably well. I didn’t tell him to stop playing with my nipples as foreplay; I just asked that when he started playing with me down below and when we were having sex that he keep playing with them. He didn’t exactly need a lot of encouragement.
Anyway, we eventually broke up and I was distraught for a lot of reasons, but one of the reasons (a very minor one) was he wouldn’t be helping me make my breasts more sensitive anymore. I think about a month or so passed before it finally dawned on me that I could do it myself. God, don’t ask. I feel dumb just writing that. Why did it take me so long? I don’t know. I guess in a strange way I hadn’t thought of my sexuality as my own. I had gotten to used to thinking as something that he controlled since he was always the one that wanted to and tried to and succeeded very well in getting me aroused.
So I started masturbating around this time, lol. I’m sure there were a lot of reasons I started. I was alone. I’d gotten used to having regular sex and suddenly there was no regular sex. I started to read a LOT of mind control / hypnosis fiction and to visit IRC chatrooms and things like that (is IRC still around? Now I have my fun on Second Life.) And also I decided to see if I could increase the sensitivity of my own breasts by masturbating. It worked pretty well I thought, but it was hard to tell because the second I started to get aroused just from playing with my nipples, my hand jumped with a life of its own (totally not my doing, I can assure you, it was like a ghost on a Ouija board!) right down between my legs and my finger jumped right on to my clitoris.
So at this point, my breasts are maybe like 30% erogenous, which was still better than 5%.
Then one day I met a nice guy and we dated and he did this thing which sort of did something in my head (I never told him. I should start telling people things.)
He gave me a long breast massage. He’d never done it before so I wasn’t expecting anything. We were laying on the bed together. We had been kissing a little, nothing fancy, no hard makeout sessions or anything. He took my top off and relieved me of my bra and he began to just gently touch my breasts. Very gently, sliding his finger and fingers and hand around gently. It was nice, not terribly sexual, but nice. And then gradually he began to massage them harder. My eyes were closed by this time. I was just relaxing and enjoying it. He began to squeeze them and pinch my nipples. He started to get really rough with them. He would slap around them, hard, but not too hard, just right below that stinging threshold. He began to use his hands to clutch them, grab them, squeeze them and then he’d rub them and I got completely turned on. Not just turned on….hot. I laid there and just felt good while he stoked my fires and then the fire flared red hot in me and I had to have him inside me.
I’ve gotten seriously turned on before, but this was a surprise. I even remember thinking “oh he’s not going to get anywhere with my breasts, but I’ll let him try.” This was in the middle of feeling myself get hot and starting to want him. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that he was turning me on just through my breasts alone. It had never happened before.
He had me and I was glad because I was so wet that he actually complained about it. I felt a little bad actually because he wasn’t getting a lot of, um, traction. I’m not sure what to call it. I was so wet that he tried to dry me out with a washcloth (which didn’t feel wonderful, just so you know). Anyway, he managed it somehow because I was very wet and it was very good.
Ever since then, it’s like I knew that I could get turned on just through my breasts and that was enough. I’d say my breasts are about 50% erogenous or so now. But with the right attention, under the right circumstances, I bet they’d go to 100%.
I’ve always wondered if I could climax only from nipple play. I’ve never met anyone in person who could, but I’ve always heard it was possible.
Maybe one day?